To be continued....

Well my surgery was meant to be today. I got a phone call two days ago saying it needed to be postponed due to bereavement leave. Needless to say, I was devastated. I think I cried for a few hours and then was still pretty depressed the next day. I'm a bit better today but I just don't really was to talk about it to anyway. Which leads me to my next point...

It turns out that when you go "public" about your upcoming surgery, it becomes everyone's business. And I mean EVERYONE. My husband is on repeat at work "it's been postponed, no new date yet".  I'm getting phonecalls, messages etc from everyone which range from "that sucks!" to "well at least it's not YOUR family member who died" (really? Is that helpful??), and then there are the people who are annoyed because I somehow messed up their weekend plans by not having the surgery (um, sorry, I'll try harder next time...). It's becoming almost like the surgery isn't about or for me anymore, it's about everyone else. And that's a really bizarre thought to try wrap my head around. 

When I get my new date (and I don't even know when I will be told the new date) I'm going to try tell as few people as possible this time, because really the only people that NEED to know is my husband, my parents, and obviously myself. 

It's a strange journey that I'm on. It's a hard journey, but I'm getting there.